WTF day...

Okay, so blog happening totally late today. It seemed like if I did anything today it went heinously wrong so I have decided to just stop and try things tomorrow. And just in case you need a laugh, I made you a little list of all the shit that was shit today.

1). Needed to clean. Got all books out of storage area to arrange artfully on bookshelf. Could have sworn I have more interesting books --nope. And subsequent dust bowl created by moving stored items gave me an asthma/allergy attack as I carried all the laundry up the two flights of stairs from the basement --leaving me feeling like an absolute fat girl with a problem (and I exercised today, too), also made it hard to smoke, which is inconvenient. "Fatty Magee, why do you take the stairs?" "I--wheeze--wheeze--like --wheeze--the stairs." Come on.

2). Needed more room on my C drive. Moved all Itunes to roaming external hard drive. Erased all playlists unintentionally (have not tried to reset everything up as it is a massive undertaking, and super pissed off about it). Decided while I would be off the computer for a while that I should install updates --Guess what? Time for Vista Service Pack 2 --took like three hours, even with a clean C drive. Fuck, fuck you, Vista!

3). Went to make little cakes --don't have half the shit I need to make cake. This super hypes-up sense of anxiety about still not unresolved menu for tomorrow night date. Anxiety leads to difficult breathing, smaller asthma attack. Do monk-like hour of quiet mediation to clear lungs and mind. Somehow achieve once again calm state, will figure something out. Oh, and had a helpful glass of wine during mediation.

4). Even though we have filled out application after application, after bloody God damn application, still nothing on the employment thing. I have not even come up with a word that can convey the utter, absolute frustration of being an capable, smart, reliable employee sitting here waiting for someplace to call me. It is a lot like deep despair, with a little rage, and a dash of self-loathing/self-flagellation.

So, now that I have listed it all and it doesn't look that bad --not being abused, not bleeding, no broken bones or bullet holes. I suppose I may be a little over dramatic. Oh, alright, totally over dramatic, and yes, I AM fishing for flattery and sympathy --so, you give it, because I want it. Gimme.