Now as a ‘Dating Scientist’ I do read my fair share of dating articles. Tonight I read a really interesting one on Yahoo. It was (and here is the relevant except from it):
For guys: A guide to girl talk
By Amy Spencer
What she says: “So, what have you been up to?”
What she means: “Why haven’t you called me? Are you seeing someone else?”
Why she says it: If we haven’t talked to you in a few weeks and then you suddenly start calling again, all we want to know is, What the heck took you so long? But because we want you to think we’re laid-back “Hey, whatever” women, all we dare squeeze out is a general inquiry. “I don’t want him to know I care,” says Emilie Giroud Capet. Our biggest fear? That you’ve been calling other women instead of us. Whether that’s the case or not, you’re best off filling in your missing weeks with very unromantic things. “I’m hoping he’ll tell me he’s been working really hard,” says Emilie, “or better, that he’s been really sick.”
So, I really have to say this one is totally true. I use it. There were a couple other ones I agreed with, but this one really jumped out, especially in light of the third date being scheduled two weeks after the second one. I just get this general distaste in my mouth like ‘so you’re calling someone else this week, huh?’ And I know this is a simple over-reaction. It’s not like I have not been busy too, but I just seem to be willing to make time to hang out with him (or write him interesting e-mails), while he is giving me what he can spare from more important things.
I suppose in the early stages of dating this is how it goes sometimes (he likes me, he likes me not), but his general disinterest is beginning to make me think about getting back on that stupid site and looking for someone who would be serious about me. Which would be a bummer because I really like him, ya know?
Still, there are articles out there that say I should be still looking even though we are on date number three. I've just never been that kind of girl. If I like you, then I like you. I respect my date enough to stop looking momentarily until he gives me a reason to keep looking. Maybe, that is incredibly old fashioned, in this day and age. I don't know. I have honestly not returned about three other e-mails from nice guys out of respect for the one I am going out on dates with. Is that an antiquated concept now? --Oh, and respect is not keeping me very warm at night.
No comments:
Post a Comment