So, guess who's favorite aspiring author got comfy with strippers last night. Uh, yeah, that would be me. I'm the one in the picture with my shirt on. Please note that sh*t eating grin as it appear in most of the pictures. It was really a magnificent time. They were excellent dancers and considering I wasn't paying them to chat, really did exactly what they were supposed to do, which was take off their clothing for my money.
I have no idea what their names were. I wasn't paying attention to their names much. I mean look at those jeans. They smelled really good too, which was a total bonus. And when I did talk to a couple of them they were really sweet and nice, which is also very cool.
That one in the middle he was my favorite. Mainly because he was tall like I like'em. And look at those shoulders, a monkey can swing from a nice tree like that. However, they did a really cute number to 'Save A Horse, Ride A Cowboy' all dressed up as cowboys and for some reason it really did the trick for me. I've never even liked cowboys and there are plenty of them out here. There was however, no Nerds or Lawyers like I was hoping. Oh, well, I'll settle for hot cowboys...I suppose.
Yeah, that's the smile on my face when I pay two bucks to have some guy lap dance me in a bar. However, this is just after and he is just as nice from behind. Come on, it was a cell phone picture in a really dark bar, you're lucky to be seeing it at all. Plus, if I ever go into politics I can say this was just random coincidence that there is a nearly naked stripper behind me shaking his a$$. I was only there to deliver the good word of Jesus to the Heathens.
Yep, just standing around looking hot. I bet they work out all the time. I got to touch a bunch of them actually, which my sister said is a 'no, no', but they were really nice to touch, like great skin, slick, warmish. Just really nice to touch. This is not saying it was okay to just put your mitts all over them, but they put my hands on them so it wasn't like I wandered into a museum and started petting the paintings, they MADE me touch'em. Really is it any wonder I am broke? I mean seriously.
Once again a nice shot of my fav, Tall Guy. Look at that sweet, sweet babyface. A lovely picture of a sweet boy who made me happy and has not caused me one moment of unhappiness. Thus, he is little more than a fantasy, as real boys do nothing but cause me stress and emotional bullshit. Ugh, don't even get me started on that one, even the one who was working out recently decided to piss me off. I should have just handed over his Valentine's day gift to this guy, just shoved it down the front of his tight, tight jeans and walked away with a smile on my face.
Maybe had I done that I would still look like this. I had a very good time. The ladies I went with also had a very good time, as we confered about it and passed around pictures this morning. My new phone's camera wasn't great so my pics were not half as good as these, however I did get a short video of them dancing which no one else had, so that was kind of cool. As experiences go it was one worth having. Now, the girls want to try and get me to go with them to Iowa to a real strip club. I'm not sure about that one, but who knows, it could be fun right?
On a hilarious side note, when I got home I got undressed, to put my nightgown on, and a dollar fell out of my bra. I have no idea how it got down there. None. Yeah, I went to see strippers and ended up with money in MY underwear. I think that only says positive things, really. Don't you?
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