Issues....

Up late night tonight. As usual you don't find me on here unless I have some kind of issue. Which we kind of have in spades, just all the way around. Well. kind of. So, my roomies are moving. This is a good thing and a bad thing. I am staying put and getting a new roomie. She is another sister so it will be pretty much the same, in some ways I guess. But, it will mean more privacy for me, which I think is good. I would like to be able to invite a dude over once in a while.

Oh, yeah and still single, in case people were wondering, but not totally single. There is the ever-present Nerd Prince who has been lots of fun like usual and a kind of new guy. This is were my problem lies, as usual. Now, when I was fooling around with Mr. EU/PA I didn't really have a feeling of conflict as I was not really interested in a relationship with him. There was a development with the aforementioned 'doctor', whose title is more like Mr. English, as I like that one better. Mr. English is interesting, somewhat older, but has a lot of the same issues as most boys. He made a nice recovery from the "Dating Anger" blog with an articulate apology or explanation of what he really meant, so I have gone a couple more dates with him. He moves slowly.....very slowly, so for a fast mover, like me, that can, and is at times, very frustrating. However, I like him, so I am moving slowly with it and playing very casual about it --even if he doesn't really want to see me more than once a week and I have weird suspicions about whether I am the only girl he is seeing right now.

So, now I am having an issue about whether to tell my Nerd Prince about Mr. English. Now, this is not for the exact same reason I didn't want to tell him about Mr. EU/PA, because what I have with my prince is wonderful and comforting and comfortable and he is my very best guy friend I have ever had -ever. However, this with Mr. English is different from what I had with Mr. EU/PA. Mr. EU/PA never made it past three dates, even if we fooled around. Mr. English is on date five with me and we are starting to discuss things like sex and long term plans, goals and past histories -deep stuff with the intention of moving forward into some kind of relationship. I have even told him about my Nerd Prince and the fact that we dated previously but are still tight friends, which he said he had no problem with (at least now).

But, I cannot seem to get up the balls to tell the Nerd Prince about it. I can't cause that boy pain, it makes me want to die. He has problems of his own and I wouldn't want to cause him even a moment of discomfort, plus, there is the chance...just a chance, mind you, that he would react in a couple of ways I could not handle, like turning around and telling me he liked me more than friends at this point (even if he has said he didn't want to date me on like three different occasions) or freaking out and not talking to me anymore --both of which would make me absolutely crazy.

However, it could be nothing. Like I said, I have sneaking suspicions I am not the only girl Mr. English is going out with, although I have not asked him about it. People who have been cheated on get suspicious. I am pretty relaxed about it, but there are little things like this seeing each other once week thing or the fact that I have no idea what he does all day, but he e-mails only every once in a while and (just like Mr. EU/PA) says he doesn't check it often, which simply says intense lack of interest to me, which I hate. As we have stated before, I am sick to death of having to work for it all the time --if you're interested, act fucking interested...I mean I do, why is reciprocation so difficult on that. So, this could be another one that will simply crash and burn like the rest and, if so, why do I need to get my panties all in a bunch and tell my Nerd Prince about it when I think it might only upset him....Hmmm, I will have to think more on it.